Dig-it-all Cable.

So I fired up the digital cable for the first time last night.  We've had it for about a month now and this is the first time its crossed my mind.  See, with 2 tivos (3 tuners), a wii (for viewing Internet videos), and over 400 DVDs I have altogether way too much content to consume.  Especially since its summer in the city and there's pretty much always something great going down.

Anyway, its pretty cool, and much higher quality than streaming pirated TV shows from sites that get closed down faster than Fox cancels great programming.  We watched a couple episodes of Flight Of The Conchords from on demand HBO.  That show is great.  Period.  If you don't have access to it, find a friend who does and snuggle in close cause you're in for a treat.  I'm not gonna say anything else, just go.  Now.

Fight For Your Right To Parrrr-take.

Google is fighting to get its foot in the door of the wireless spectrum that's soon to open up because of digital TV.  It is making a pitch to the FCC as to why they should encourage an open platform rather than let current telecoms strangle every last penny out of us.  God knows I'm paying more than I should for basic human rights like text messaging, so this plea sparks and interesting thought in my head.

The US was founded with the idea that people would elect representatives to the government who would represent their interests and legislate accordingly.  I'm not gonna say that's not happening any more, but you have to admit that corporate interests have taken quite a chunk out of the free governance that was originally enjoyed, and my elected officials seem to squabble more about sex scandals than effect positive change.  So what is our next step?  How do we fight this great silent influence?  We need a corporation that lobbies for the common good, against the greed and corruption that has proved so effective at increasing the bottom line for shareholders against the defenses of consumers.  We need to support a champion who will stand against the sedentary business models which benefit industry not through innovation, but through stagnation and planned obsolescence.

I'm not sure that Google is definitely that champion, but I think they're as close as we've ever seen.  And I think we need to rally behind them because a champion without constituents stands for a fleeting dream that cannot be held.

• Google Public Policy Blog: Restoring competitive balance to the upcoming spectrum auction

Point And Laugh At The Next H2 You See.

Indiana- a local hill climb competition took a wide array of entrants including a turbo diesel Dodge, a sheriff's patrol car, a Hummer H2, and a Model T.  Yes, Model T like Henry Ford in 1921 Model T.  Gary Le Fever, 70, has made a few modifications to the 86 year old ringer, like some parts from a Model A, valves from the 1920's and carburetors from 1930, that boost the T's HP up to 100 from its standard 20.

The decked-out oldster smoked it's competition up the 475ft climb, besting the H2 by
.78 seconds with a time of 9.96.  Ouch for the Hummer, slower than a Tin Lizzy with 216 less horsepower.

• Flivver Beats Hummer - Forbes.com

Keep That Effing Cat Away From Me.

There's a cat in Providence that has an uncanny ability to pick out fading patients.  The hospice staff thinks its very helpful as the patient only has about 4 hours to live after Oscar gives them the snuggle of death.

I can imagine someone giving the low-down to a newbie.  "Hey, welcome aboard.  I'm Sam.  Don't sit in my goddamn chair.  Tuesday is pudding day.  That's Oscar the cat you'll die if he sits on you.  Nurse Bronson has a nice rack.  See ya around!"

The way I see it they have two routes to take here:
1) buy him a stethoscope and and tiny white coat and start calling him Dr Oscar or
2) buy him a tiny black robe and a sickle.

• Oscar the cat predicts patients' deaths - Yahoo! News

You're Keeping Those Tonsils Till You're Married.

New research shows that tonsils may be more susceptible to HIV than other parts of the mouth.  So in keeping with their line of thinking on the Promiscuity Vaccine , conservatives should be railing against tonsillectomies because it will give teenagers the message that BJ's are awesome.  Right?

Ok, fine the researchers advise that people don't go get their tonsils removed as an HIV prevention tact, since only 1 in 5,000 oral escapades contracts the disease.   So removing everyone's tonsils wouldn't slash disease rates the way a universal vaccine against HPV would.

But I still find it a humorous parallel to draw; relating removing a child's tonsils with increased sexual deviance.

• Tonsils may help transmit HIV during oral sex - health - 26 July 2007 - New Scientist

Let Me Give You My Numbers.

Are you a guy out at the bar scene looking for a less overt yet deviously skeezy way to land that biddy? Well never fear, some young entrepreneur has your back. For a low printing and shipping surcharge you can keep your wallet stocked with reasonably realistic fake ATM receipts showing your massively bloated checking account balance. That way when "searching" for something to scrawl your number on you can accidentally give her the impression that you're either A) fabulously wealthy enough to jump that very moment B) worthless at managing your finances to have left so much money in a low yield checking account or C) a guy that has fake ATM receipts printed up to give to women. Win-freaking-win.

• Fake ATM Receipts - Featured on BuzzFeed

Now Make It Fold Into A Briefcase.

I was trying to get the hell out of the city a couple weeks ago with a couple friends.  We were making all the wrong turns; finding roadwork, closed bridges, morons and traffic from hell at every corner.  Which brought to mind the question of flying personal aircraft instead of commuting by roads.  My buddies didn't think it'd happen in our lifetime, but I know there are some rich crazies out there who are just aching for a chance to pilot their own UFO to work in the morning.  Course living in Washington will push back the time line a few years because the levitating cars will need to be able to out-maneuver the F-15s and anti-aircraft fire they are sure to draw.  But it will still totally be worth not sitting on 395 trying to get over than damn river.

• Commute by hovercraft with the Moller M200G - AutoblogGreen

I Ain't Sayin Nothin.

Ever get the feeling that the Bush administration is run strangely like the mafia?  Sure, you'll take down a few mid-levels on piddly perjury charges,  but you'll never find out about the big shit if we all just clam up.  Gonzales did an amazing impression of Johnny Tightlips with his parrot-like mastery of the phrase "I don't recall" but it looks like he may have spilled a few beans.  Its such a weak charge compared to all the other crap they were probably up to, but hey sometimes you've gotta take someone down on tax avoision rather than mass murder.  Especially if he's the leader of the free world.

• BBC NEWS | Americas | FBI chief 'contradicts Gonzales'

Daily Swag.

Alright folks, I've taken the plunge and placed yet another order at the DP store.  I picked up a couple of totes so I don't have to kill the earth when I go grocery shopping any more.  I also ordered three t-shirts that I already have and a few bumper stickers, even though I'm in no way ready to start defacing my car.  So here's the deal: if I hear you, in casual conversation with non placebo-addicts, cite Daily Placebo as the source of information / indisputable proof of something you'll be entered into an impartial drawing for one of these fabulous prizes.

Daily Placebo Name Dropping Sweepstakes Contest Jargon:

One entry per person, no purchase required, entries subject to contest official's judgment, drawing date TBD on August 1, 2007.

No Top Gear For You.

Well, they can't get shit done for me again.  There were plans to bring Top Gear, the British motorcar show, to the US for our personal consumption.  But one of the stars of the show couldn't bare to live in LA for 3 months away from his family.

Which -brace yourselves- I find perfectly fucking reasonable.  I wouldn't want to live in LA either; especially not for a driving show.  What I am pissed off about (I know, you were worried I wasn't going to yell at anyone) is the fact that they think they should make a Top Gear in America specifically for American consumption.  What?  You've got a perfectly good show, and even quite a few seasons in the can, why don't you just put it on the god damn air?  Afraid we won't be able to understand the accents?  Or more afraid that we'll see the awesome cars they get in Europe and cry out at the US automotive industry?  You decide.

• Top Gear - Jalopnik