You may have seen these pictures of the McDonald's pizza around the internets. Also, maybe not. I have to admit, I wouldn't have thought of that. But I gotta say, 2 cheeseburgers, a pack of fries, and chicken nuggets baked into a pizza is the least disturbing thing about this picture. What the heck is with the gun and large stabby-type knife there? Is it "i'm taking this picture, I'd better make sure my weapons are in it"? Maybe he thinks the hamburgler is gonna burst in at any minute and swipe his pizza. Or maybe this dude just doesn't have any place to set something down that's not next to two killing tools. I dunno, but I gotta go get something to eat; and bake it into something else to eat.
Showing posts with label creative design. Show all posts
Showing posts with label creative design. Show all posts
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Now That's Creative.
You may have seen these pictures of the McDonald's pizza around the internets. Also, maybe not. I have to admit, I wouldn't have thought of that. But I gotta say, 2 cheeseburgers, a pack of fries, and chicken nuggets baked into a pizza is the least disturbing thing about this picture. What the heck is with the gun and large stabby-type knife there? Is it "i'm taking this picture, I'd better make sure my weapons are in it"? Maybe he thinks the hamburgler is gonna burst in at any minute and swipe his pizza. Or maybe this dude just doesn't have any place to set something down that's not next to two killing tools. I dunno, but I gotta go get something to eat; and bake it into something else to eat.
Friday, October 26, 2007
Just Squirt It Into My Mouth.
Yes, ez-cheese meets breakfast. I can't really begin to describe how disgusting I find this. Not the pancakes oozing out of a pressurized container part, but the absolute waste and laziness this product represents. If you can't crack an egg and pour some milk, you don't deserve pancakes. There's 8 pancakes in this conveniently disposable and landfilling container, as opposed to the about 300 servings found in a cardboard box of pancake mix. What's next, some kind of potted meat aerosol sausage machine? Please don't buy this. Go get some Eggos if you're too stupid/lazy to make pancakes from "scratch".
*Note: Actually making pancakes from scratch isn't really that hard, and using a premade mix is even easier. If you need to squirt them out of a can, I'm not sure you're gonna be able to handle the arduous tasks of flipping them over, pouring syrup from a bottle, and putting them into your mouth with a fork.
Friday, August 17, 2007
Grain By Grain.
These rice fields are a little ridiculous. You thought corn maizes or crop circles were meticulous agricultural art? Think again. These patties in Japan are planted with yellow, purple and normal green leafed rice to recreate famous paintings. They're informal competitions amongst the farmers that have grow more and more detailed over the years. I'm not really sure what the equivalent would be in the US; turfing stars and stripes into your neighbor's yard with your 1992 Ford Explorer Sport?Ree Rawt Row Ra Reet...
A lot of times dual purpose items do two tasks half as well as they should. Which means that the usefulness of one item is compromised into two almost half items; not really a good trade-off. But I have to say this transformer couch looks pretty nice. It actually looks like a couch, and it actually looks like a bunk bed. (although I bet those bunks are pretty narrow.) Now lets see it morph into a ghetto blaster whose tapes turn into animals.P.S. Ever thought about how you'd spell the transformers sound? Yeah, me neither. Luckily the Internet is an indefatigable wealth of knowledge. Also this couch would be 4.7 times cooler and nearly irresistible if it transformed of its own volition accompanied by that noise.
Friday, May 25, 2007
Don't Put Marbles In Your Nose.
Crap. I had big plans for tonight. Pull up a tub of mac-n-cheese pop in a terrible Jackie Chan movie and huff a can of compressed air from Memorex. But, no, they decided that maybe kids shouldn't be shooting air in their brains and have taken it upon themselves to solve the problem. So the new cans will have a decidedly nasty, bitter smell to them, despite receiving the same innocuous packaging.
I can see this splitting the little not-quite-druggies in three directions:
1) Finding real recreational drugs to do
2) Canned air roulette, where you pick from a selection of identical cans and hope it doesn't smell like vomit.
and 3) Reverting to the more primitive, lactose rife, abuse of whippits.
I can see this splitting the little not-quite-druggies in three directions:
1) Finding real recreational drugs to do
2) Canned air roulette, where you pick from a selection of identical cans and hope it doesn't smell like vomit.
and 3) Reverting to the more primitive, lactose rife, abuse of whippits.
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Fresh Child Juice.
Look, if you can find a hole on the boy that you want to put your lips on, be my guest.
Got this one from Dee's RSS feed (yeah, I talked him into it)
Its a Swedish invention to aid in removing whatever liquid -or near liquid- may be in or coming out of your child at a rate no sufficient to satisfy a parent. That's right folks, line up to get your snot straws. Just the thought of sucking some phlegm into my soft palate is enough to make me want to ralph.
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
Hands On Parenting.
Friday, March 09, 2007
Watch This.
I haven't worn a watch since 2003. (And I sported one that summer only because I was traveling through various countries and didn't have access to a cell phone or computers but needed to be on time all the time.) This isn't because I tapped the secret lifeforce that flows through us all, or because I don't care about showing up on time. (I actually value being prompt, which makes my poor internal sense of time particularly ironic.) Its just that I don't need a watch to do it. I have three devices on my person right now that tell time. The title of this Slate article makes me think they have a little more insight but they pretty much just attribute the decline to prevalence of public displays and personal devices. Which is the educated guess I would have made too. They do have a bit of information on the downward slide of watches and the rise of wrist accessories.
I remember sitting in kindergarten while the teacher was showing the class how a clock worked. This was the first time I consciously decided not to learn something. I said to myself "I'm not paying attention to this." And I didn't. I don't know if I didn't think the content was important enough to warrant my attention, or if I had something better going on in the back of class, but as a result I didn't learn to tell time from an analog clock until the 10th grade. Well, let me revise that. I knew how to tell time, it just took me longer than it should have. Kinda like the difference between knowing how to multiply and memorizing your times tables.
So I had digital watches from around 6th grade till 10th, when I bought a watch off a kid named Marco in environmental science class for ten bucks. He had a binder full of watches. I paid with a check. It was pretty sweet with an analog display and a clear reverse panel so you could see the mechanism that automatically wound from natural wrist movements. So I forced myself into using that kind of display until the watch broke about 8 months later. I feel fine about it and hold no ill will to Marco or whatever source Marco had for these timepieces. I figure that investment surpassed my expectations at about week 3.
So I've never really worn a watch as a decoration. But maybe I should start, you know as a "portable status of wealth." And I know just the place, Bellum Watches. They scour every source they can think of to get classic old watches, refurbish and embellish them with hand engravings or whatever and sell them for god knows how much. Seriously, each one is a commissioned work, so there's no prices on the site. If a skull on the back of a Rolex doesn't say I've got cash, I don't know what will.
"Newsweek Interactive advertising sales office revealed that fewer than half of these mostly young, urban, educated professionals were wearing watches. They don't need to. -- All of this is bad news for the watch industry—or at least for that sector of the watch industry that sells watches meant to be used to tell time, as opposed to watches that are meant to be worn as fashion accessories or as portable symbols of status and wealth."
I remember sitting in kindergarten while the teacher was showing the class how a clock worked. This was the first time I consciously decided not to learn something. I said to myself "I'm not paying attention to this." And I didn't. I don't know if I didn't think the content was important enough to warrant my attention, or if I had something better going on in the back of class, but as a result I didn't learn to tell time from an analog clock until the 10th grade. Well, let me revise that. I knew how to tell time, it just took me longer than it should have. Kinda like the difference between knowing how to multiply and memorizing your times tables.
So I had digital watches from around 6th grade till 10th, when I bought a watch off a kid named Marco in environmental science class for ten bucks. He had a binder full of watches. I paid with a check. It was pretty sweet with an analog display and a clear reverse panel so you could see the mechanism that automatically wound from natural wrist movements. So I forced myself into using that kind of display until the watch broke about 8 months later. I feel fine about it and hold no ill will to Marco or whatever source Marco had for these timepieces. I figure that investment surpassed my expectations at about week 3.
So I've never really worn a watch as a decoration. But maybe I should start, you know as a "portable status of wealth." And I know just the place, Bellum Watches. They scour every source they can think of to get classic old watches, refurbish and embellish them with hand engravings or whatever and sell them for god knows how much. Seriously, each one is a commissioned work, so there's no prices on the site. If a skull on the back of a Rolex doesn't say I've got cash, I don't know what will.
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
Need to Seat 16?
Check out this bit of sneakish designing. Its an expandable seat that uses accordion-like sections to bend, twist and shrink if need be. I know, you've got to have kind of a plywood decor going for this to feel at home in your living room, but the concept alone should buy it some leeway. Just think, now you won't have to ransack the neighbor's when you invite way too many people over for the game.
Friday, March 02, 2007
One Card To Rule Them All.
Freaking club cards. You've got to sign up for them to get basic sale items at most stores these days. Unless you've got the mettle to run the gambit of assuming the cashier will have one to swipe for you. Course that's no good if you're often in the self-checkout lines. So I've got accounts at a bunch of stores cause its just wasteful if you don't. But I don't really carry the cards, I just punch in my phone number, cause having 10 more cards in my wallet would make a Mt. Fuji in my back pocket.
But wait. Look at justoneclubcard.com . They let you type in your bar code number and store name and put up to 8 tags on the front and back of one card. Awesome. I saw a lifehack a while ago about cutting and taping your cards into one master card, but this is even better. I'd even pay a small fee if they'd send me a laminated version in the mail. As it is you print out the sheet and are left to your own devices. Do you have any laminating devices?
But wait. Look at justoneclubcard.com . They let you type in your bar code number and store name and put up to 8 tags on the front and back of one card. Awesome. I saw a lifehack a while ago about cutting and taping your cards into one master card, but this is even better. I'd even pay a small fee if they'd send me a laminated version in the mail. As it is you print out the sheet and are left to your own devices. Do you have any laminating devices?
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Just Follow Your Creepy ET Finger Home.
Remember the first time you saw a child tethered to a parent with bungee cord? If you're like me, you immediately thought "child on a leash, the next step will be choke collars." Well that may not have happened yet, but I still think those kids are getting treated like pets and are more likely to behave as such.For more discerning parents, check out this wireless locating device from Dandella. They're wireless devices that glow red when you're headed the wrong way and green when you're getting close. Think of the Hot/Cold game, but useful. Actually, screw wrangling kids, I'm passing these things out next time we go out in the city. Not than anyone ever gets "lost" and needs to be wrangled...
Saturday, February 24, 2007
Don't Nag Me About Putting Beer On My Cereal.
I keep telling you, the Japanese are ten years ahead of us. They've got solutions for problems that we haven't even heard of yet. Like, what do you do when people stop drinking milk? Make beer out of it. Brilliant! A crafty brewer came up with this solution after last years massive milk surplus. I guess its better than pouring it down the drain. And people say we're the land of excess. Oh wait, we burn food, which making alcohol out of it seems pretty reasonable. Back on top, baby!
Anyway, you're probably not going to see this too soon, right now sales are restricted to six liquor stores in Nakashibetsu, Japan. So unless you've got a serious jonesin for a fruity low-malt milk derivative, you're stuck just dreaming about calcium bed-spins.
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Electric Minimalist.
Alright, I'm thinking hard about how to get one of these. I mean, I already get my groceries delivered to me. What else do I need a trunk for? Its a new concept from Carver in Sweden. They've merged a motorcycle and a car to get... well you really have to watch the videos to get it. But its a three wheel vehicle that seats two passengers cockpit style. The drive system is located over the two rear wheels and the passenger compartment banks up to 45 degrees into the turns. The hybrid version will get 100mpg and top out at 100mph, reaching 60mph in 6 seconds. And you can charge it from a 100 volt outlet. Is there a list or something I can get on?
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Ocean Motion
Wave power is something that I don't really think about all that much when I consider clean alternative power sources. Normally my thoughts drift straight to solar and wind and then on to the dreamy hunk that is fusion. But that may be off base. Here's a presentation by Max Carcas of Ocean Power Delivery at a Google Tech Talk.
The presentation is about an hour long but it gives great details about the actual device as well as energy potential, market and economics of wave power. Watch the video if you have the time he's much better at explaining it than I am, but I'll put some of my notes below. Skip to about 26:00 for video of the wave tank simulation.
Solar currently generates 100 watts per square meter, wind 1000 watts per square meter while wave power houses the potential for 20,000- 70,000 watts per square meter depending on teh region. Wave energy can be thought of as compressed stored wind energy.
Waves are a highly forecastable energy source, which is a major concern with wind and solar generation. Output, even without forecasting, can be held constant within a 5 and 10% threshold.
The device is called "Pelamis" (a type of sea snake) for its vertical and horizontal motion as waves pass under it. It resides in an optimal depth of 80m which is 2-10km from shore depending on the region. At this depth the waves are not compressed by the shore and retain more energy while remaining in a non-volatile state (not breaking).
A single unit is 140m long and 3.5m wide with 4 rigid sections and 3 joints that contain pneumatic actuators. The joints move up and down as well as side to side at non uniform angles to induce a kind of harmonic tuning that is used to maximize the power output depending on the type of wave. That single unit will average around 750 KW output which is enough for about 500 homes.
The device is designed to be survivable with "load shedding" as an innate feature of the design. If a large wave is encountered it will simply pass through the wave rather than rising too high on a crest and breaking apart. This is much the same as the way that wind turbines can feather in excess wind or a hydro-electric plant can discharge excess water.
The technology was designed using existing technology as a guide. Natural gas, Oil and various other marine industries have developed standards couplings and materials that are well suited to this type of environment. The device itself employs very few revolutionary, and untested, modules which makes it very reliable.
The current cost of deployment per kwh is above wind but below solar. There is a distinct trend in applications of new technologies that cost drops fairly dramatically as process is streamlined and technologies refined. Wind turbine prices have dropped 80% since the first wind turbine project; so one might make an educated guess that a similar trend will follow for wave power. Government subsidies generally provide incentive to new projects during the first few years to help with this innovation cost hurdle, as we've done for solar and wind.
The presentation is about an hour long but it gives great details about the actual device as well as energy potential, market and economics of wave power. Watch the video if you have the time he's much better at explaining it than I am, but I'll put some of my notes below. Skip to about 26:00 for video of the wave tank simulation.
Solar currently generates 100 watts per square meter, wind 1000 watts per square meter while wave power houses the potential for 20,000- 70,000 watts per square meter depending on teh region. Wave energy can be thought of as compressed stored wind energy.
Waves are a highly forecastable energy source, which is a major concern with wind and solar generation. Output, even without forecasting, can be held constant within a 5 and 10% threshold.
The device is called "Pelamis" (a type of sea snake) for its vertical and horizontal motion as waves pass under it. It resides in an optimal depth of 80m which is 2-10km from shore depending on the region. At this depth the waves are not compressed by the shore and retain more energy while remaining in a non-volatile state (not breaking).
A single unit is 140m long and 3.5m wide with 4 rigid sections and 3 joints that contain pneumatic actuators. The joints move up and down as well as side to side at non uniform angles to induce a kind of harmonic tuning that is used to maximize the power output depending on the type of wave. That single unit will average around 750 KW output which is enough for about 500 homes.
The device is designed to be survivable with "load shedding" as an innate feature of the design. If a large wave is encountered it will simply pass through the wave rather than rising too high on a crest and breaking apart. This is much the same as the way that wind turbines can feather in excess wind or a hydro-electric plant can discharge excess water.
The technology was designed using existing technology as a guide. Natural gas, Oil and various other marine industries have developed standards couplings and materials that are well suited to this type of environment. The device itself employs very few revolutionary, and untested, modules which makes it very reliable.
The current cost of deployment per kwh is above wind but below solar. There is a distinct trend in applications of new technologies that cost drops fairly dramatically as process is streamlined and technologies refined. Wind turbine prices have dropped 80% since the first wind turbine project; so one might make an educated guess that a similar trend will follow for wave power. Government subsidies generally provide incentive to new projects during the first few years to help with this innovation cost hurdle, as we've done for solar and wind.
Thursday, February 08, 2007
Hello, [reader name], Nice Day To Read Blags, Isn't It?
This is kinda funny. If you're not creeped out about surveillance and tracking and whatnot. Mini owners (the car, not small persons who hold property) in major cities that enroll in a program will see personalized messages displayed on Mini billboards as they drive by. The system works by retrieving data wirelessly from the key fob in the car and generates a message based on survey information the user has filled out. (Like telling Kate that its a nice day for her convertible) Kind of neat but also kind of weird that people volunteer to be advertised to about a product they've obviously already bought.
I could see someone striking up a deal with EZpass to do much the same thing; of course it'd have to be an opt-in situation or risk massive privacy invasion.
I could see someone striking up a deal with EZpass to do much the same thing; of course it'd have to be an opt-in situation or risk massive privacy invasion.
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Hopped Up On Heels.
Wow, talk about dedication to a stupid idea. I mean, don't get me wrong, ladies look nice in heels, but sometimes they just cause train-wrecks. And apparently they don't feel so good either. Luckily someone's figured out how to inject collagen into the bottom of your feel as a fix for one of the issues. And I thought women had a higher pain tolerance. Turns out they're just not as clever as me. Having a medical procedure instead of buying comfortable shoes just sounds silly.
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
What Is Going On Here?
Check out this aerial imagery of a Nimitz class Aircraft Carrier located west of Shanghai, China.
Notice anything? Zoom out a little. Yeah, its in a pond. Now, I know there are various floating casinos that basically have motes around them. But that's to avoid local gambling laws. What could be the point of having an aircraft carrier on a duck pond?
Well, it turns out that's a kickass "military education center" at an after school camp. Its a building in the shape of a 7/8 scale Nimitz Nuclear Carrier. "Think of it as a cross between summer camp, a school field trip, and a communist EPCOT Center." Wow, that place sounds great. And at 6 bucks to get in, I'm definitely going next time I'm in Shanghai.
Notice anything? Zoom out a little. Yeah, its in a pond. Now, I know there are various floating casinos that basically have motes around them. But that's to avoid local gambling laws. What could be the point of having an aircraft carrier on a duck pond?
Well, it turns out that's a kickass "military education center" at an after school camp. Its a building in the shape of a 7/8 scale Nimitz Nuclear Carrier. "Think of it as a cross between summer camp, a school field trip, and a communist EPCOT Center." Wow, that place sounds great. And at 6 bucks to get in, I'm definitely going next time I'm in Shanghai.
Thursday, December 21, 2006
Look Into My Eyes And Smell My Arm.
This is odd. Its a patch that you wear on your wrist or arm that emits a fragrance rather than a drug. And the aroma is sposed to make you randy. I'm not exactly sure what the target audience is here. Unless there are a bunch of people out there who wish they were hornier than they naturally are. I feel like most of these things will be used in the pursuit of altering someone else's state. They don't dissolve in liquid though, so you'll have to think of another plan. They come in two varieties mens' and womens' so plan your strategy and order carefully. You'd hate to wake up in the morning and find that you'd attracted the wrong flavor of companion.Also on the olfactory front: humans are better at smelling than you think. They're just out of practice. Researchers conducted a study whereby they made blindfolded college kids sniff out a scent trail to chocolate through grass. Anyone else think that sounds demeaning and hilarious?
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Proper Representation.
Someday the world will tremble beneath the might of the DPI logo. 
Lifehacker has a link to an interesting article about designing logos incorporating letters. Its a pdf link but not a problem with your foxit pdf reader, right? Anyway I wish I was good at logo design so I liked reading it and appreciate the various tips it gave. I think mostly the best designs just come through messing around with what you've got. And refining and messing. Oh, and having some artistic talent may help too, I'm not sure. I sure wish I could make a smooth curve, as is evident in this little mock up of what I'm working on for a Daily Placebo Industries logo. (go get that Dauphin font so you know what d, p and i look like). I can't wait till its polished enough to be emblazoned on my private jets, satellites and volcano strongholds. Oh and maybe on a blazer with fine hand ticking.
P.S. Anyone know how I can make a bad-ass torch effect to dot the "i" with?
Lifehacker has a link to an interesting article about designing logos incorporating letters. Its a pdf link but not a problem with your foxit pdf reader, right? Anyway I wish I was good at logo design so I liked reading it and appreciate the various tips it gave. I think mostly the best designs just come through messing around with what you've got. And refining and messing. Oh, and having some artistic talent may help too, I'm not sure. I sure wish I could make a smooth curve, as is evident in this little mock up of what I'm working on for a Daily Placebo Industries logo. (go get that Dauphin font so you know what d, p and i look like). I can't wait till its polished enough to be emblazoned on my private jets, satellites and volcano strongholds. Oh and maybe on a blazer with fine hand ticking.P.S. Anyone know how I can make a bad-ass torch effect to dot the "i" with?
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Stones Squeal On Hog Line Burns.
Now granted I've only been curling for like half a season, but I hadn't really considered that one of the most controversial calls in the sport is a hog line violation. See, you slide off the hack with a 44 lb stone while balancing on a Teflon sole against a sheet of ice. 33 feet out is the "hog line" which is the plane by which you have to have released the stone. If anyone touches the rock after that line it is "burned" and removed from play.
I'm not really coming that close to a hog line violation, I usually release a couple feet before the line, so I never really thought about having to make these close calls. Obviously you wouldn't touch the stone if you knew you were over the line, and at competitive Speils there are hog line judges to make sure.
Like the digital timer and electric starting gun, technology is being used to absolutely differentiate as athletes push the boundaries of rules. These rocks have circuitry in them that detects when the thrower's hand lets go as well as detect when the stone passes the hog line. Hang on a fraction too long and red lights flash on the stone so you know to remove it. Pretty cool stuff, but at 650 bones a pop its a little prohibitive for smaller clubs. But next time I see a national competition on TV I'll be looking for these babies.
I'm not really coming that close to a hog line violation, I usually release a couple feet before the line, so I never really thought about having to make these close calls. Obviously you wouldn't touch the stone if you knew you were over the line, and at competitive Speils there are hog line judges to make sure.
Like the digital timer and electric starting gun, technology is being used to absolutely differentiate as athletes push the boundaries of rules. These rocks have circuitry in them that detects when the thrower's hand lets go as well as detect when the stone passes the hog line. Hang on a fraction too long and red lights flash on the stone so you know to remove it. Pretty cool stuff, but at 650 bones a pop its a little prohibitive for smaller clubs. But next time I see a national competition on TV I'll be looking for these babies.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)