Elite Dorks.

I have never ridden a segway. I have never fired a gun. I'm just trying to be fair and lay down my complete lack of experience in both of these fields. But if I was a Special Weapons and Tacts officer I'm pretty sure I would eschew the use of a segway in favor of... oh, being able to run wherever I needed to go. I'm told these things drive around based on how you balance your weight and I have just one question for these dudes riding around with hand canons drawn. What does recoil do your aim while wobbling around on a platform that bobs and weaves as a result of recoil? Ok, I lied, I have another question. Don't your inner thighs just burn like nascar rubber from squeezing that handlebar all day?