Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Well, Crap. That Didn't Work.

I know you might like pandas, but I'm not sure we should be fighting for an animal that is so obviously destined to get snuffed out.  I mean, we did our best.  Coaxed his parents into bumping uglies in captivity, raised him by hand so he didn't get sat on, brought him food and spent millions on enclosures.  But in the end we coddled him too much and he couldn't hack it in the real world.  He ended up getting whacked by other pandas and falling out of a tree.  Talk about an unfortunate "accident."  I feel the world's first panda mafia movie coming on. 

I had too many ideas for article titles on this one, its just too hard to decide.
  • My mom says I'm tough, but she's never left the house.
  • City Panda goes to Country; gets ass kicked by locals.
  • Panda released to wild; Wild refuses delivery.
  • Zoo Panda gets 'jumped in' to panda gang.
  • Public schools don't prepare you for life on streets... er trees.

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