Step 4C: Insert Positronic Brain.

I've been thinking about toys recently, and I've concluded that adult toys are better than kids' toys. Well, they can be; for adults. And I had a conversation with someone about this and didn't realize that 'adult toys' usually means something else until the other person said it for the first time. So let me just say, no, not that kind of adult toys.

But there are a few problems with grown-up toys. First is where to learn about all these cool things. You have to scour every model shop, dork convention, and the entirety of the Internet to know that robotic bartenders, pogo stick hydrofoils, fuel cell car models, and remote controlled jets even exist. There is no "Adult Toys 'R' Us" (not that kind of toy) where you can stroll down the isle and see representatives for every conceivable group. It takes hard work just to figure out what you want.

Once you have something in mind, the problem of where to get one still remains. I know from first hand experience the pang of buyer's remorse, as the real McCoy didn't quite match up with my lofty expectations. Its very difficult to judge quality or feasibility of things without being able to lay your hands on one. Like I said, there's no "Adult Toys 'R' Us" where you can go try it before you buy it.

And of course there is the largest obstacle to adult toys, their price. I've had my Carrera priced out for years now and I'm nowhere close to imagining that I could afford it. So you kinda have to keep a lid of your dreams; shoot for the slightly inconceivable and you just might get there. It also helps not to lust after the brand name.

We have to start de-conditioning ourselves. As a good little American I was taught from a young age that store bought goodness one-uped any homemade contraption. While some of the time I did rig my own toys and imagine them up to spec, I still believed that a packaged toy was better. This is not so with adult toys. It takes some work to get over the hurdle and put faith in yourself that given the right tools and materials, maybe even the right kit, you can one-up the store and their piddly wares. Just look at websites like make and hack-a-day and you'll see people making cool stuff every day. Shrug off that iPod and RAZR ad campaign. Make your own adult toys and be proud of yourself for once.

So now I'll leave you with an excerpt from a wired article about making a robot from a prefabricated kit. Its an entertaining and quick read. I'd recommend it to anyone who has dissuaded themselves from building something they wanted.

There's an odd, Asimovian irony to having to put together your own robot; it seems like the sort of thing you'd want a robot to do for you.
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The next chapter tells me that the bags of parts are clearly labeled, and I should under no circumstances open a bag before I'm told. The first set of parts I need is in bag B. I look around for bag B, and it turns out it's sealed inside bag E, which I haven't been told to open yet. This is why a robot can't assemble a robot.

• Wired News: A Robot That Walks Like a Gorilla